Lane Bryant Says ABC, Fox Censored Commercial

I can think of about a hundred commercials that ought to be yanked before this one. Read the story here -- all of it.

Lane Bryant Says ABC, Fox Censored Plus-Size Lingerie Commercial

The Ad The Networks Refused (At First) To Air

All It Takes Is A Bic Pen, And Huge Talent... Meet Mylne.

8 Year Old Rally Car Driver - This kid has a future!

A Pair Of Jacks.

Two of the most familiar voices you're likely to hear on any given day are named Jack, and you've probably never seen either of them.

Our first Jack is really named Dick Sittig, of Secret Weapon Marketing, who created fast-food CEO Jack (in the) Box in 1994 and continues to voice Jack in their commercials to this day.

Sittig is a virtual recluse compared to our other Jack, the Jack of Jack FM. Few listeners here realize that they're sharing the sarcastic vocal talents of one Howard Cogan with 60 other markets airing the Jack FM format.

Paste this link into your browser to see how Dick Sittig saved Jack-in-the-Box's bacon 16 years ago:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack_(mascot)

...and here's a great interview with Howard Cogan, of special interest to those of you (and you know who you are) intimate with the world of radio:

http://aircheckerradioindustry.blogspot.com/2010/01/how-cogan-is-jack-fm.html

New Social Networks.

Twitter, Twitter, Twitter. That's all I hear about any more. Somebody's making millions, and it ain't me. Maybe I'll just have to invent some new so-called social networking sites and see if I can rake in some cash.

Let me know if you'd like to throw away I mean invest some money in the following ideas:

• Angry? Depressed? Dispossessed? You're needed at...wait for it... BITTER.
• Elly Mae Clampett will host an animal support group at.... CRITTER.
• So involved in the Internet you're texting on the john? Join....SHITTER.
• Writing blogs that nobody reads? Waste more time at...DITHER.
• From the South? Like fried food? Tell us all about it at FRITTER.
• Violent major league home-run kings on steroids are welcome at HITTER.
• Into archery? Join QUIVER.
• Country-western fans can join those from sit-com "3's Company" at...yes... RITTER.

I think I'll stop now and wait for my medication to kick in. I now return you to your regularly scheduled blog...

40 Years Ago...

....the crew of Apollo 13 safely returned to Earth.

Back then, America could not only send men to the moon, we could figure out how to get them home when catastrophe struck. Damn, but we were good back then.

America always needs heros, even when things go wrong. We seem to be out of the hero-making business these days, unless you're a politician (Barack Obama and Sarah Palin come to mind) , or the winner of American Idol.

So it goes.

Miracles Do Happen.

Not long ago, a friend sent along a chain letter that, among other things, asked if I'd ever seen a miracle. I wrote back saying that I had not.

I spoke too soon. At the time I got that chain letter, I hadn't listened to Susan Boyle's debut CD. I have now, and if Boyle isn't a miracle personified, I don't know what one could be.

You must be familiar with Susan Boyle by now; it's been almost exactly a year since she appeared on the UK's Britain's Got Talent TV show. Boyle, 48, frumpy and totally without any apparent style, walked on stage and blew the audience away with her rendition of I Dreamed A Dream.

I don't care that her subsequent album was number one in sales worldwide, or that millions watched her initial performance on YouTube. If nobody else but her neighbors ever heard Susan Boyle sing, she would still be a miracle in my book.

Listen to her voice, damn it. You'd swear she was turning 30, not nearing 50. She can sing high, low, up down, sideways -- any way, any range she wants. Listen to her version of Cry Me A River and you'd think you were listening to one of the great vocalists of the 1950's.... just add in some tape hiss or pops and snaps from a vinyl record, and it would be perfect. Amazing Grace? Boyle knocks it out of the park. She even puts a new spin on the Boyce & Hart pop trifle, Daydream Believer.

Listen to her voice. Pray her new found success doesn't hurt her; that people will not take advantage of a simple woman with an amazing gift. After all, miracles don't happen every day.

Steve Jobs: How to live before you die | Video on TED.com

Apple's Steve Jobs gives a commencement address at Stanford. A truly great speech.

Steve Jobs: How to live before you die | Video on TED.com

Adam Savage's obsessions | Video on TED.com

Here's Adam Savage from Mythbusters like you've never seen him. The video is rather long, but worth the time. I really, really, want some of the drugs he takes.

Adam Savage's obsessions | Video on TED.com

Fun With Numbers... Census Participation

Ever wonder just who did, or did not, participate in the 2010 census? Here's a link that will show you, by state, county, or city, the percentage of the homes that returned the census form. (Click on the blog entry headline, or cut and paste the following into your browser.)

http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/census/census-participation.htm

The link will also show participation in the last census, a decade ago.

I was surprised at how low the numbers are. Redlands is about average for California at 66 percent. Using the lists/search tools, I found, not unexpectedly, that low-income areas do poorly, as do cities that have a high percentage of vacation homes, such as Mammoth Mountain.

For some really scary numbers, go to the southern states of Mississippi and Alabama, where you'll find towns where less than a quarter of the residents returned census forms. Smaller towns seem to do worse than larger communities, for some reason. Surprisingly, most Kentucky towns have a higher participation rate than most in California.

Recovery? Good Luck With That.

Back in the days of the last big recession to his this area, I sold advertising to car dealers. Long about 1992, my territory generated around $2 million in revenue from the following stores:

Center Chevrolet-Geo

Holiday Olds-Mazda

Royal Chrysler-Plymouth

Kennedy Cadillac

San Bernardino Lincoln-Mercury

Somebody's Pontiac Jeep-Eagle

Somebody's Acura

Somebody's Hyundai

Somebody's Mitsubishi

Fairview Ford

Moss Bros. Dodge

Chuck Obershaw Toyota

Metro Nissan

I watched a lot of sales managers desk a lot of deals back in those days. San Bernardino was never a rich community. Lousy customer credit was always a problem, but the dealers, at least most of them, seemed to do OK.

Never did I think I'd see times like these. First, Uncle Sam closed Norton AFB, taking with it thousands of steady paychecks, both direct and indirect, that fueled car sales. The region grew, and with that growth came more competition in Ontario, Fontana, and Moreno Valley.

I, too, left for supposedly greener pastures for a few years.

Take a look at that list. Nine are gone. Only the last four still exist in one form or another. The manufacturers don't build Oldsmobiles or Pontiacs or Geos or Plymouths or Eagles any more, and Chevy, Ford, and Chrysler have a fraction of the market share they once did.

One thing for certain: while certain banks may be "too big to fail", that phrase doesn't apply to cities. Just look at San Bernardino. Or Detroit.

Thank God I don't sell advertising anymore, either.

Hey, Boomers, Wrap Your Head Around These Stats:

John, Paul, George, and Pete Best formed The Beatles fifty years ago.

It's been forty years since The Beatles broke up.

John Lennon has been dead thirty years as of this coming December.

George Harrison has been dead nine years.

Paul McCartney is 67 years old.

Ringo Starr will be 70 in July.

Yoko Ono is 77 years old.

Sean Lennon is 34 years old.

Julian Lennon is 47 years old.

Manager Brian Epstein, often referred to as "the fifth Beatle" would be 75 now.

Producer George Martin is now 86 years old.

Banished Words.

Some suffer from overuse. Some are just insufferable. Check the list. Copy the link below, or click on the blog entry headline. Enjoy.

A Death In The Family.

I lost a beloved friend today. Shadow was "just" a cat, but one of the best friends I ever had. I've written about Shadow before in my blog -- how smart he was, how human he seemed, but words can't describe how much he meant to me.

Some animals are always ready to please their owners; others quietly co-exist, preferring to just be in the background. Shadow's temperament was as varied as the weather; one day aloof, and another silly and playful, racing about the house in what we called his "Seabiscuit" routine.

One time he let it be known he was ready for his dinner. When my wife set a plate of a new flavor of cat food down in front of him, we both swear that he sniffed it, turned around, and said, and I quote, "What the fuck..." clear as a bell, and marched off, disgusted.

He knew our routine. He knew to wake me at 3:45 in the morning for work, and when it was time to go to bed. We'd laugh that he hadn't gotten the memo when the time change came, and he'd get me up an hour early.

Every night at bedtime, he'd crawl up on my chest, and rhythmically pad my chest, his claws digging through my shirt and into my skin. If I for some reason had pulled the blanket up, he would be visibly dejected, deprived of his game.

Lately, since the cancer came, he could hardly stand as he tried to do his little two-step dance. He'd get off one or two cycles, slowly, before the effort became too much.

Towards the end, his weight loss was dramatic. Shadow was literally skin and bones, yet he was more eager than ever to go outside, attempting to roll on the concrete despite the pain, and enjoy the sunshine. He gave up worrying that our other two cats, who he hated, might be out there with him. Shadow even managed to catch, and eat, one final lizard in his last week.

Through all the pain the cancer brought, the loss of blood, the loss of energy, Shadow kept his dignity. He never looked at me seeking pity. Shadow was too strong for that.

A lot of humans could have learned a great deal about life from Shadow. I know I did, and I will miss him very very much.

Hate Your Neighbors? You Need One Of These.

I'm waiting for one of these...

http://www.foreignpolicy.com/articles/2010/04/01/the_little_nukes_that_got_away

to show up on eBay, myself. Hey, if, as the article says, they no longer have any value in today's arsenals, I don't see why they don't sell them surplus... Oh, wait, I forgot about the Taliban. Darn. It would have looked soooo cool on the front lawn, too.

Flags Of Our Future Fathers.

Not long ago, I ran across an old 48-star flag at work. It's been fifty years since Alaska and Hawaii became states, bumping the U.S. flag to an even fifty in count. I got to thinking about what would happen to our flag should Puerto Rico ever decide on statehood, and, not surprisingly, there is already a 51-star flag designed for just such a contingency.

Even more surprising is that the U.S. Army has designed flags to accommodate up to 56 states.

Where would we get 56 states, you ask? Google and Wikipedia, as always, to the rescue....

As it turns out, we could end up with even more than that, if everybody who wanted their own state got their way. Think about these changes to our U.S. map -- lots of them make sense to me.

Eastern Washington joins with Idaho's panhandle: Eastern Washington has absolutely nothing in common with the western part of the state -- not weather, not lifestyle, jobs, politics -- nada.

Divide California in half: This idea actually passed the California senate just a few decades ago. Differences may not be as extreme as in Washington state, but many exist; plus the state is just too damn huge to manage. Personally, I'd give everything east of the Sierra Nevada's "spine" to Nevada, with which it has more in common.

Speaking of Nevada, Los Vegas is a city-state all to itself, again having nothing in common with the vast desert and agricultural territory that makes up the "real" Nevada. Those stupid Las Vegas types don't even pronounce the state's name correctly... it's Nee-VAAAA-duh, for gosh sake.

Which leads us to the biggest city-state of them all, New York City. Make it a state, and leave Upstate New York alone. While you're at it, break off Long Island and make it a state, too.

There have been revolts over water in Georgia, taxes in Virginia, and arguments in Texas dating back to its admission into the Union.

Then there's all those islands out in the Pacific we mainlanders never think about except when watching documentaries on WWII or atomic bomb tests. The Marshall Islands, the Northern Marianas, Guam, the U.S. Virgin Islands, and American Samoa all are under our government's thumb. Shouldn't they receive recognition, too?

Think beyond, for a minute, what this would do our flag, and think about the repercussions in American politics. How would, say, twenty extra Senators change the present balance of power? Would it swing the USA left or right? I'll let you ponder that. Get back to me with your thoughts.