So, GM pulled your Buick/GMC franchise this past week.
That's sad news, your family having owned the oldest Buick dealership in the whole goddamned country. GM must have always been something of a thorn in your side, though. I know they kept pressuring you to build a shiny new facility for, what, decades now? (Bet you're glad you blew them off on that one!) And, they continually gave you product that Redlands, along with the rest of the USA, knew was iffy on quality and desirability.
So: screw 'em.
You're not even 60 years old, and you've said yourself that you are too young to retire. Lets look at the next phase in your career.
One thing money can't buy in the car business is reputation. The Hatfield name has been a trusted part of this community for a long time. There's no reason this can't continue.
Starting tomorrow, start planning on turning your repair facility into the largest, independent shop in the area. Invest in equipment and people so that the Hatfield name will be known as the place to go to have every make serviced with Hatfield-quality care.
Got a Chevy? Bring it to Hatfield. Honda? You bet. Toyota, Ford, you name it, make it your goal that your guys can fix it, right, the first time, without the bullshit people get elsewhere.
As for selling cars, everybody knows the money is in used cars, not new, so go for it. Again, don't limit yourself to GM domestics -- this town is full of people looking for the cleanest, most perfect BMW, Mercedes, or Lexus they can find. Make Hatfield the place to find it.
To borrow from "Field of Dreams" -- if you sell it, they will come.
Come on Bill, go for it. Redlands will be with you.
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Someone Obama Should Invite To Dinner
Surely, you know who James Dyson is.
Dyson is the engineer/inventor of the Dyson vacuum, among other things, and a billionaire. But the reason Dyson should have a couple of hours of the President's undivided attention is because Dyson has some really good ideas on how to save the free world.
I heard Dyson interviewed on a local radio show while driving home from work, so I'm going to paraphrase what he said. I'm sure you could look up the specific facts and figures, but here's the gist of it...
Great design and engineering can restore America, the UK, etc. by sheer fact that technological advancement is the key to a market driven economy. If your engineering is better than your competition, the business will come your way. If you need an example, look no further than what Steve Jobs has done again and again with Apple. It was our technological advancements that made America the dominant world power, and we're letting that slip away.
Dyson points out that we don't train enough engineers. I recall him saying that the UK graduates something like 24,000 engineers a year in a market that needs 36,000. The US mints like 60,000, but Japan trains twice the amount we do in the US, and China four times that. Look at the result -- where is innovation coming from? And where are the resulting dollars/yen/yuan/pounds/Euros from sales going?
The best insight was this: In America and Britain, our politicians are, by and large, trained as lawyers. In Japan and China, political leaders have engineering backgrounds. Think of the difference in values that makes when it comes to allocating governmental priorities.
Oh, and one more thing Dyson mentioned. Job satisfaction. Only about 15 percent of engineers are dissatisfied with their jobs, far less than folks in other careers, like sales, medicine, and media.
We ought to be showing every 13 year-old kid in America what great opportunities there will be as engineers.
Dyson is the engineer/inventor of the Dyson vacuum, among other things, and a billionaire. But the reason Dyson should have a couple of hours of the President's undivided attention is because Dyson has some really good ideas on how to save the free world.
I heard Dyson interviewed on a local radio show while driving home from work, so I'm going to paraphrase what he said. I'm sure you could look up the specific facts and figures, but here's the gist of it...
Great design and engineering can restore America, the UK, etc. by sheer fact that technological advancement is the key to a market driven economy. If your engineering is better than your competition, the business will come your way. If you need an example, look no further than what Steve Jobs has done again and again with Apple. It was our technological advancements that made America the dominant world power, and we're letting that slip away.
Dyson points out that we don't train enough engineers. I recall him saying that the UK graduates something like 24,000 engineers a year in a market that needs 36,000. The US mints like 60,000, but Japan trains twice the amount we do in the US, and China four times that. Look at the result -- where is innovation coming from? And where are the resulting dollars/yen/yuan/pounds/Euros from sales going?
The best insight was this: In America and Britain, our politicians are, by and large, trained as lawyers. In Japan and China, political leaders have engineering backgrounds. Think of the difference in values that makes when it comes to allocating governmental priorities.
Oh, and one more thing Dyson mentioned. Job satisfaction. Only about 15 percent of engineers are dissatisfied with their jobs, far less than folks in other careers, like sales, medicine, and media.
We ought to be showing every 13 year-old kid in America what great opportunities there will be as engineers.
Monday, May 4, 2009
It's A Great Time To Start Your Own Car Company
Really. I'm not kidding.
Here's how:
You've all heard that the Pontiac brand from General Motors is going to die. There are two opportunities to be had based on this news.
Here's the first opportunity, but I'll save my favorite for last.
GM and Toyota jointly build cars in an assembly plant here in California. I believe it's the last assembly plant in the state. The Toyota Matrix and the Pontiac Vibe are kissing cousins, but with Pontiac going the way of the Dodo, Toyota is burdened with owning half an assembly plant with a soon-to-be bankrupt partner. Now, the Matrix has been successful; the Vibe, solely because of it's linkage to GM, less so. The factory is underutilized.
(Your Name Here) Motors buys GM's part of the factory in bankruptcy. Use federal stimulus money, plus stick a gun to the state of California and threaten them with the loss of their last car factory if they don't chip in. Continue to assemble the Vibe and license it to another domestic manufacturer, Chrysler-Fiat. (They sure as hell need a decent car of that type.) Or, score a real coup de grace and sell them right back to General Motors as they come out of the recession, sans product.
Now for the fun stuff:
Pontiac has one car (just one) that has been a critical success as well as a decent seller. It's their two-seat sports car, the Solstice. It has stunning looks, great ergonomics, and excellent performance. It's also been sold in a (choke) Saturn variation. There's some factory somewhere that's certainly going to close unless GM rebadges it as, say, a Buick or Chevy. But Chevy has the Corvette and the new 2010 Camaro, and the Solstice is certain to compete for the Camaro buyers GM and its dealers so sorely want. As for Buick? You've got to be kidding me.
Here's what you do:
Take a page from Carroll Shelby's playbook. Ol' Shel, as he's known, is the much beloved former race driver who created the legendary Cobra back in the 1960's by combining a beautiful but anemic British roadster with American V8 horsepower. It was a terror. It ate Corvettes for breakfast.
Now, Shelby is still in the car business, but he's about a million years old now. Of course, that doesn't mean much, as he was forced to retire from racing due to a bad heart -- fifty years ago.
Somewhere, out there, there's a car guy's car guy (paging Jay Leno?) who knows that the Solstice with a bad-ass V8 instead of its little 4 banger would be a 21st century version of the Cobra. GM knows it too --they engineered the car you can actually assemble a V8 Solstice yourself with factory parts.
So:
A) Acquire Solstice plant and tooling by sticking gun at federal/state's head over pending job loss
B) Stuff Corvette 405 HP engine in the cars
C) Race it!
D) Sell it through select dealerships, much as Shelby did the Cobra.
E) Become a legend overnight.
Back in the day, there was a saying: Race on Sunday, Sell on Monday. Racing brings in the wannabes. Just ask Porsche.
If GM won't play ball on selling the Corvette V8 direct, buy them over the counter from Mr. Goodwrench in the parts department, or go to Chrysler (!) -- they've got plenty of extra Hemi engines these days.
Now, that would really scare the pants off everyone.
Here's how:
You've all heard that the Pontiac brand from General Motors is going to die. There are two opportunities to be had based on this news.
Here's the first opportunity, but I'll save my favorite for last.
GM and Toyota jointly build cars in an assembly plant here in California. I believe it's the last assembly plant in the state. The Toyota Matrix and the Pontiac Vibe are kissing cousins, but with Pontiac going the way of the Dodo, Toyota is burdened with owning half an assembly plant with a soon-to-be bankrupt partner. Now, the Matrix has been successful; the Vibe, solely because of it's linkage to GM, less so. The factory is underutilized.
(Your Name Here) Motors buys GM's part of the factory in bankruptcy. Use federal stimulus money, plus stick a gun to the state of California and threaten them with the loss of their last car factory if they don't chip in. Continue to assemble the Vibe and license it to another domestic manufacturer, Chrysler-Fiat. (They sure as hell need a decent car of that type.) Or, score a real coup de grace and sell them right back to General Motors as they come out of the recession, sans product.
Now for the fun stuff:
Pontiac has one car (just one) that has been a critical success as well as a decent seller. It's their two-seat sports car, the Solstice. It has stunning looks, great ergonomics, and excellent performance. It's also been sold in a (choke) Saturn variation. There's some factory somewhere that's certainly going to close unless GM rebadges it as, say, a Buick or Chevy. But Chevy has the Corvette and the new 2010 Camaro, and the Solstice is certain to compete for the Camaro buyers GM and its dealers so sorely want. As for Buick? You've got to be kidding me.
Here's what you do:
Take a page from Carroll Shelby's playbook. Ol' Shel, as he's known, is the much beloved former race driver who created the legendary Cobra back in the 1960's by combining a beautiful but anemic British roadster with American V8 horsepower. It was a terror. It ate Corvettes for breakfast.
Now, Shelby is still in the car business, but he's about a million years old now. Of course, that doesn't mean much, as he was forced to retire from racing due to a bad heart -- fifty years ago.
Somewhere, out there, there's a car guy's car guy (paging Jay Leno?) who knows that the Solstice with a bad-ass V8 instead of its little 4 banger would be a 21st century version of the Cobra. GM knows it too --they engineered the car you can actually assemble a V8 Solstice yourself with factory parts.
So:
A) Acquire Solstice plant and tooling by sticking gun at federal/state's head over pending job loss
B) Stuff Corvette 405 HP engine in the cars
C) Race it!
D) Sell it through select dealerships, much as Shelby did the Cobra.
E) Become a legend overnight.
Back in the day, there was a saying: Race on Sunday, Sell on Monday. Racing brings in the wannabes. Just ask Porsche.
If GM won't play ball on selling the Corvette V8 direct, buy them over the counter from Mr. Goodwrench in the parts department, or go to Chrysler (!) -- they've got plenty of extra Hemi engines these days.
Now, that would really scare the pants off everyone.
At Last, A Good Reason To Be Old.
Great news on the Mexican Swine Flu front...
It appears that much of our panic was misplaced. Early reports sounded grim: young, healthy people were being struck dead in Mexico City. If the young were dying off, what would happen to the old and infirm?
HA HA! It's good to be an old fart sometimes. NPR reports that the influenza that's captured all the attention is just a derivative strain of the one my generation got back in the early 70's. Which means, while we're not exactly immune, it's NO BIG DEAL! We've already got the antibodies or whatever the hell the doctors call it to knock it down to manageable size.
So it looks like it's going to be a pretty anemic pandemic. At least for us Boomers.
I guess it's true:
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Yeah baby!!!
It appears that much of our panic was misplaced. Early reports sounded grim: young, healthy people were being struck dead in Mexico City. If the young were dying off, what would happen to the old and infirm?
HA HA! It's good to be an old fart sometimes. NPR reports that the influenza that's captured all the attention is just a derivative strain of the one my generation got back in the early 70's. Which means, while we're not exactly immune, it's NO BIG DEAL! We've already got the antibodies or whatever the hell the doctors call it to knock it down to manageable size.
So it looks like it's going to be a pretty anemic pandemic. At least for us Boomers.
I guess it's true:
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Yeah baby!!!
A Plea For Pigeon Protection, If Not Proliferation
A few days ago, I found myself sitting on a curb eating lunch in downtown Los Angeles.
Behind me, a recently opened (and likely soon to be closed) low-end restaurant was trying to lure customers off the street by playing loud pop dance music, as if that would influence the average passing wino's appetite for burgers or burritos.
A pigeon landed a few feet from me; sizing me up as a potential candidate for a free meal. Now, pigeons are considered pests. They're dismissed as "flying rats" even by bird lovers. Is it just because there are so many of them?
I could see intelligence in his (her?) eyes, judging me: was I a threat, or a friend?
I once read that higher-order birds can be identified by walking, as opposed to hopping. Cute little sparrows hop. Eagles, hawks, and yes, pigeons walk -- and my iridescent friend here not only walked, he trotted along in time to the dance music blaring from the diner.
I about busted a gut laughing. Where was my video camera when I needed it? It was as if John Travolta, circa Saturday Night Fever, had wrapped himself in a pigeon suit and was strutting down this decaying LA sidewalk.
How can anyone hate pigeons after a performance like that?
Behind me, a recently opened (and likely soon to be closed) low-end restaurant was trying to lure customers off the street by playing loud pop dance music, as if that would influence the average passing wino's appetite for burgers or burritos.
A pigeon landed a few feet from me; sizing me up as a potential candidate for a free meal. Now, pigeons are considered pests. They're dismissed as "flying rats" even by bird lovers. Is it just because there are so many of them?
I could see intelligence in his (her?) eyes, judging me: was I a threat, or a friend?
I once read that higher-order birds can be identified by walking, as opposed to hopping. Cute little sparrows hop. Eagles, hawks, and yes, pigeons walk -- and my iridescent friend here not only walked, he trotted along in time to the dance music blaring from the diner.
I about busted a gut laughing. Where was my video camera when I needed it? It was as if John Travolta, circa Saturday Night Fever, had wrapped himself in a pigeon suit and was strutting down this decaying LA sidewalk.
How can anyone hate pigeons after a performance like that?
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Why Hollywood Is A Dangerous Place
The story goes something like this:
The studio wanted a monument to its great past. Many a great western was filmed on their lot, along with the low-budget B movies and serials that kept kids coming back to the theater week after week.
Now, they'd already named a building after their Western heroes Roy Rogers and Dale Evans.
"How about a life size sculpture of Trigger?" someone suggested. Trigger, as we all know, was Roy's horse, more recognisable in his day than all but a few human actors now alive. Kids went to see Trigger as much as Roy and Dale, I suspect.
So, the sculpture was created. Trigger, rearing back on his hind legs, stood nearly a dozen feet tall. They placed Trigger next to the pedestrian entrance of the new parking structure.
The artist faithfully reproduced Trigger's flaring nostrils, his rippling muscles, and... let's just say that the artist made damn sure Trigger was anatomically correct in all respects.
Some say that the sight of Trigger's substantial 'package' drew complaints, it being roughly eye-level with the office workers, background extras, make-up people, et al, trudging back and forth to their cars.
Knowing Hollywood folks, I'd say that it's more likely that the grips and juicers made crude jokes; the office women giggled, and the gay writers and hair dressers gasped in envy.
But one day, the great stallion Trigger was rendered gender neutral. A smooth piece of fiberglass was substituted for the controversial appendages.
There's a lesson here.
In Hollywood, no matter how famous you are, no matter how much you've done for the studio, someone is eager to cut your balls off at the first opportunity.
The studio wanted a monument to its great past. Many a great western was filmed on their lot, along with the low-budget B movies and serials that kept kids coming back to the theater week after week.
Now, they'd already named a building after their Western heroes Roy Rogers and Dale Evans.
"How about a life size sculpture of Trigger?" someone suggested. Trigger, as we all know, was Roy's horse, more recognisable in his day than all but a few human actors now alive. Kids went to see Trigger as much as Roy and Dale, I suspect.
So, the sculpture was created. Trigger, rearing back on his hind legs, stood nearly a dozen feet tall. They placed Trigger next to the pedestrian entrance of the new parking structure.
The artist faithfully reproduced Trigger's flaring nostrils, his rippling muscles, and... let's just say that the artist made damn sure Trigger was anatomically correct in all respects.
Some say that the sight of Trigger's substantial 'package' drew complaints, it being roughly eye-level with the office workers, background extras, make-up people, et al, trudging back and forth to their cars.
Knowing Hollywood folks, I'd say that it's more likely that the grips and juicers made crude jokes; the office women giggled, and the gay writers and hair dressers gasped in envy.
But one day, the great stallion Trigger was rendered gender neutral. A smooth piece of fiberglass was substituted for the controversial appendages.
There's a lesson here.
In Hollywood, no matter how famous you are, no matter how much you've done for the studio, someone is eager to cut your balls off at the first opportunity.
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